We all hold multiple identities in our lifetime, each with their own sets of socially defined values, visions, expectations, etc. These may not directly conform with what you represent. But for every identity, you have a set of values, visions, motivations, goals, beliefs and purpose which are not entirely the same as your inner self.
For example, someone who is entrenched in his identity as a son will see his entire existence as a son. He will act in accordance with what’s best for his parents. He will spend a lot of time with his parents, do things for his parents, forsake other things in his life if it’s needed to make them happy. When it comes to making important decisions, such as career or partner, he makes sure his parents are in approval before he takes any action. His parents are the central focus of his life.
However, his real self is more than just being a son to his parents. If his parents are to ever exit from his life, he will be in a state of total loss. His life will start spiraling out of control since the anchor he has been building his life on so far is gone. When you become overly attached to any one of your identities, you run into the risk of an identity crisis when that particular identity is removed.
That’s why it’s important to find your inner self. Without question: God is the Ultimate Creator of life but You are the manager of your own life and you has been assigned with the responsibility to live your life for yourself. This life is one that’s defined by you, not what is defined by your roles or identities. If you are not connected with who you really are, you are probably just living your life for others -- pursuing others’ goals, living up to others’ expectations and projections of you, rather than what you really want. To know your inner self is the first step of living a conscious life of your making . . . just as God has intended when you were created. Many are the plans in a person’s heart, but it is God’s purpose that prevails.
God is the Ultimate Creator of life but You are the manager of your own life . . .
You Are More Than Your Identities
Because everyone is unique, your real self can’t be boxed in by any single identity or label. For example, Shinelia and I are personal coaches to some, strategic consultants to others, parents, a son/daughter to our parents, friends to our friends, mentors to our students, and even pastors to others - but we're more than these labels. These are just roles and titles. None of the roles and responsibilities alone accurately surmise who we truly are. Likewise,the inner-YOU is someone who cannot simply be defined or labeled by any one label.
Every action you take should move you toward your inner self. If there are identities which do not fit who your inner self represents, there will be two possible options you can take. First, try to find the common ground between those identities and your inner self. This may involve shaping the identities to fit who you are. If that doesn’t work at all, the other (more drastic) option will be to remove or change the identity altogether. Has your role at work become your identity? Or is it your position at church that defines who you are? Let's experience REAL LIFE together and notice your true identity will quickly reveal itself.
YOU ARE MORE THAN YOUR IDENTITIES